Monday, March 19, 2012

Lad of the Week

Jason Russell is a man of many talents.  He can pull the heartstrings, he can hike in jungles. And he can solve problems.

Know what a big problem these days is?  Warlords. And specifically their penchant for recruiting child
Jason Russell: Beating off religious militants, one stroke at a time.
soldiers.  Warlords have had a rich history Ghengis Khan immediately springs to mind.  But these days, in our modern, rat-race, work-a-day world, the romanticism of these particular brand of assholes has faded significantly. No one likes a warlord, that's just a fact.

So how does one, like Jason Russell, solve this warlord problem?  Raise awareness damn it, any way one can.  On any other day, Facebook looks like what we have all come to know and love.  Becky had sushi for dinner last night, Justin is only three sleeps away from his all-inclusive Dominican vacation, and Valerie's new born has funny sunglasses on!  But for one brief twenty-four hour period, Facebook changed.  This Kony chap was everywhere, and Mr. Russell wanted to make him famous, in order to take... him... down.

And good on you Mr. Russell; despite some criticisms of your charity's ulterior motives and financial transparency, and a few ill-timed pics of you posing with giant weaponry, you hit it out of the park.  Unfortunately, as with everything in a lightning speed social media universe, backlash now has the ability to begin before the lash has even started.

If you're going to post a video that you hope to go viral (about 100 million views between Youtube and Vimeo gaining fast on that cat that plays piano), remember that this will add a little stress to your life.  Deal with this stress accordingly.  A couple helpful hints:
  • Get a back massage, they're great.  Yeamax knows just the girl.
  • Fire off a few rounds from some high-powered weaponry.  Use picture of Kony as target.
  • Have a drink; CC suggests a Manlollan.
  • Go for a run.  Exercise is an excellent stress reliever.
But please, I implore you, wear clothing, specifically pants, for said exercise! You see Mr. Russell, as good as you are at raising awareness, you are not campaigning to change the game for public nudity! Nor are you, like so many breast-feeding activists, attempting to sway people's opinion of the appropriateness of certain bodily functions in public!  

So why is this cat Lad of the Week? 'Cause he is a notable example that we can all learn from.  Awareness is good, committing oneself to a cause so wholeheartedly that one has a mental break down; and suffering from malnutrition, dehydration, and exhaustion runs out into the streets with little to zero clothing on, allegedly masturbating and saying such weird and strange things that the police decide to take you to a hospital instead of jail, is not.


  1. I know when the stress of this work-a-day world gets me down I'm tempted to hit the street and beat the meat but I refrain.

    I tip my cap to you Mr. Russell.

  2. Should've just gotten himself an ice cream Kony